5 Tips On Deciding Who Stays Home With A Sick Kid -- Mom or Dad?

It seems like this flu season will never end-- and my poor kids have caught just about every bug rolling through. As equal as my husband and I like to think our relationship is-- sometimes the kids just want mom. So, how do we decide who misses work for a sick day?

Here's 5 things to evaluate before making the call. Fortunately, my husband and I have been at our current jobs for awhile so we're past the "proving our work" phase... for those not so lucky, that should be a serious consideration.

1. What's on the work schedule-- anything that is absolutely can't miss? If so, the other parent stays home.

2. Who is more able to work from home?  This is tricky though, because, everyone knows working from home with a child who is just sick enough to miss school, but still well enough not to sleep all day is impossible-- especially if you have more than one kid and the healthy one needs after school pick-up and entertainment. Thinking "I can still work from home even if my kids is sick", is one of the many little white lies working moms' try to convince themselves is true. Let's face it, a family sick day should be considered a sick day period. 

3. Will there be a career or financial impact from a missed day? Difficult to judge on this one-- fortunately my workplace is staffed with working moms and dads in top level positions so there is a degree of understanding.  But, if you're the only working mom on your team, you might ask Dad to stay home more to avoid any negative "she's a mom" connotations, as much as it sucks to say that it's a fact you have to deal with.  I used to work at an office where Dads who stayed home were viewed as compassionate, while moms who stayed home were just missing work again.  Only you can be the judge on whether or not one more day will move you to the again category-- if today's that day, insist that your partner help out.

4. If #3 isn't an issue and both parents have to be in the office, think about who wants to stay home? For me, I always want to stay if my kids are sick and sad. I know it's stereotypical and incredibly UN-post-modern, but that's just me. Yes there are LOT of times when Dad stays home or we pass the baton to Grandma due to "unmissable" work events, but when I can, I try to do it, largely due to # 5 below. 

5. Who will feel the least guilty? I think this combined with #1 ultimately makes the call. Can you miss work and not feel horrible for not going to the office--- can you NOT stay home and not be guilt-wracked for going to work?

Once you decide who stays home-- how do you tell your boss-- email or phone call? And how many details?

I usually email and try to restrict details -- no one wants to hear about your kid's bad mood and faucet nose. 

What do you think?